Okay, just so the world knows, I'm not dead.

Things got better sort of.

Right now, I'm having strange feelings that something is amiss.

I don't like it.

I hate telephones.

-Corrie

It's been so long since I've written but today hasn't been a good day.

Happy anniversary to me. What have I done?

I told the boy that I love that we need to take a break. So we are taking a bit of a break. My heart feels like I've ripped it out yet it is still attached.

I suppose I just need to know that I can fall back into love with him. I need to know that I'm not just with him and he's not just with me because we've been together soooo long.

I never said it would be easy. I only said it would be worth it.

I hope this is worth it.

Currently Listening Whiskey in the Jar #1 By Metallica see related

I am once again behind. I spend the majority of my online life that way, since as of late, I have gotten busier.

Well, forensics is winding down and I'm glad for it. I got a new cell so that is my lover. Please help me name him: he is small and shiny red.

Band is also winding down, but the show for next year is being picked soon so that is exciting to me. Colorguard here I come!!

Ben and I are still doing okay, just a little over the unofficial year marker. May is the official year mark.

Just a couple of weeks until my birthday and I am 16!!
It's an exciting concept since it's one of the birthdays you wait for forever as a kid. I'm hoping something cool will come of that. No one in the family has asked what I want though, so that worries me. Super secret plans for birthday operations as Rachel would say.

Yeah, so that's about it. Leave me lovin and help me name my new lover!
Much love, different kinds to different people.
-The One and Only Corrie N'Stuff

Currently Listening From the Depths of Dreams By Senses Fail Steven see related

Oh my goodness!

I haven't posted in fricken forever. It's probably because things are actually going really good for once. I have a forensics tournament coming up on Saturday, so wish me luck.

By the way, good luck to all those competing!

I'm uber happy for my lady because she's uber happy!!!!! *hugs*
I'm also really happy that she finally understands exactly how I feel! thh (You know I love you)

I love my Ben so much it's not even funny and the stuff that's going on with my lady makes me appreciate my boy so much more.

*sigh* Life is a big bite of good!

I love you all, different kinds to different people!
-The One and Only Corrie N'Stuff

Currently Listening Do You Realize By The Flaming Lips see related

Again, it's been awhile. My postings keep getting farther and farther apart. I guess I'm just losing track of things.

Anyway, last week was great minus a few parts. But Part 1 I'm over now. I've processed and thanks a lot to Part 2, I get it. I just wish that people wouldn't hide big things from their friends. Part 2 is taking a little time getting over, but I'll get there eventually. I swear.

I got to make banana pancakes last week and they were good. I also talked to Cortney and that was nice. I don't even remember about what, but it felt good to laugh. I got to hang out with Benjamin and that was bittersweet. Nice, but with some bad parts, like most things are. I got to go shopping a couple times, and went to Outback on Friday night. That was some grood food.

Now for the philosophical part:
Something happens and you begin to understand how someone else thinks. Here's the story; something happened to me and I now understand how one of my friends thinks or thought, I don't really know. They didn't think I understood, but I did to an extent. I understood the reasoning, but I didn't agree with it. While I still don't agree with it, I really understand now because I found myself in a similar situation, just not quite as extreme. The hardest part is trying to show someone that you finally get it. Especially when they don't really want to look at you right now. It also sucks when distancing yourself from a possibly bad situation creates problems in your relationships. Sometimes, I think high school and the people in it are overrated and dying now would be so much easier. Then again, easy isn't always the best. No, I'm not going off on a suicide rampage... Anyway, now I'm trying to fix something that got screwed up. It's survived worse things, so I'm hoping it can be fixed. If not, then I guess I did my best and that's all that anyone can ask for.

I'm done now and I think I'll go work on some homework.
-The One and Only Corrie N'Stuff